My audience for this writing piece could be anyone really. Anyone who has ever felt a loss of identity or confusion with who they are. I’d like for my readers to know that this poem expresses visuals and words that can make you feel what he’s feeling. In my piece of writing I tried to explain that in the best way possible. I’d like for you all to learn that Jonathan Mendoza shares a personal struggle in this poem and allows us to get a sense of how he feels. I tried to represent my own experience into this in a way that would connect the two together. I hope you all will be able to see the connection because although different they have some similarities. Something unique that I added to this piece of writing would be in the one part of my writing where I used repetition of “white boy” to mimic his performance to add a tone to the story. The value of this perspective is to show how one side of him differs from the other. Something I learned while working on this project was that literature can be expressed in many ways. I figured that the only literature we would be studying would be old english the “classics” but when watching these poems it widened my perspective on what literature really means. Expression of feelings and stories. “Brown Boy White Boy” showed me how the exterior of his skin protects him from racial injustices but inside he feels like screaming, he knows he isn’t affected but he is because it’s a struggle he is a part of but can’t relate to. What I didn’t learn from this poem was how he learned to over come the struggle of “biracial boy.” I would have wanted to know how he decided not to fall into a category because based off his words it seemed like he wasn’t down for putting himself in a specific section. When discussing with my peers they helped me understand that I had a lot of good points but I would not further explain them and that if I were to elaborate more, my writing piece would be better. They also told me that adding a personal experience would help connect what Mendoza is feeling to the average audience and would make it more interesting as well. My perspective in poetry has changed and it has based on the different type of videos we have seen in class. Poetry is raw and in the pieces we have seen we notice it in its true form and in stories we can relate to. If I had another week to work on this project I would probably add more to. I would like to add a piece of art with it because I love visuals. I would also like to add whats going on in todays world to add more perspective to the piece. I would like to include arguments and current day events like the “black lives matter movement.” Basically more to make it more interesting and further engage the reader. Overall, the last thing I want my readers to know before diving into this piece is that I myself, don’t see myself as a very good writer. I do struggle trying to get my message across but I tried to piece it together as best as I could to help the understanding of the message. I hope you enjoy and can maybe even connect to him and myself. In hopes I hope you all gain something from the poems we read and can see a little of yourself in each piece of writing.
-expectations and pre draft were both emailed to you; katherinecelisnyc@gmail.com
– heres a link to my rough draft and the video I’d like to share with the class!
http://archive.cunyhumanitiesalliance.org/breathingthroughwriting/author/katcelis/
The people I peered reviewed were Luis and Saeed
This poem sheds light to understanding self in society. The emotion expressed in “Brown Boy, White Boy” by Jonathan Mendoza shows the crisis of identity he feels in todays world and society. He explains how he must categorize himself and that the biracial boy in him does not know what to do. That being either or must determines his taste in clothes, music and the way he speaks. Part of him feels though he should not have the right to feel this way because he can pass, but the biracial boy in him feels oppressed because thats just another way society tells him how he should feel. I have no right to speak on a struggle I am not part of but why am I not a part of it? He mentions that the white boy is privileged the white boy faces no struggle, the white boy is aware but the white boy cant do anything about it because it is not his war. Biracial boy resents white self and he’s sorry. Sorry he is both oppressor and oppressed.
The message I feel he is trying to get out of this poem is him taking back the identity that was already categorized for him in society. A way he does this is by explaining how people see him and how he isn’t racially profiled but that inside he is awake and wants to scream because he is a “biracial boy” and he is woke he knows he is both therefor declaring himself. He also expresses a detachment with inner self. He speaks on not knowing what he can and cannot relate to and if he is really just taking up space because you look white so to the world you don’t struggle and you are protected by the exterior of your skin. Not knowing how to act and wishing his skin came with an “instructions manual.” This represents the height of his struggle with being biracial and how he feels a disconnect with both because he expresses not relating to either.
Mendoza shows that he is trapped and shows the pain he feels with the power of his words. I myself feel a connection with both his performance and message. I am not biracial, but I feel like both at times too. I am hispanic but my skin is white. I can pass for a white girl and when attending protest for inequality I sometimes have to wonder… do people see me and feel resentful because I am a “white girl” fighting for problems I cannot relate to? I feel oppressed but feel sorry for feeling so because I do not face injustices like my mother and father did. I can go down south and know I will not face discrimination. These are the many ways I relate to the biracial boy inside Mendoza and can connect to him on the level of feeling as if I am doing something wrong when in reality I’m just being me and speaking out on issues I feel should be voiced. I go home and worry about money because my mother is a single parent working 5-8. I am a minority, but a minority with white skin.
Biracial boy must categorize himself and by doing so he must reject one side. He explains “wishing he was a purebred and not a mutt” this line shows how it would be easier to just be one. He then also says “its the world that made him this way, both oppressor and oppressed, insect and the boot and biracial boy is both of them.” Ultimately taking control in his skin. Proudly saying I am biracial I am both and this is who I am. In him doing so he takes back his say, his power, and voice in not falling into the social structure that has oppressed him in deciding who he should be. I am both, take it or leave it.