“Sorry, blame it on me”- A beautiful song by Akon from mid 2007 and became one of my favourite song since my high school. The title itself hold its bold message and it often reminds me of a certain time of my sister when she was going through tremendous issue. Somehow, I can relate this song with my past experience with my sister.

On one hand, this song is all about asking forgiveness and regretting about the past that cannot be changed. Singer Akon wrote this song after the nightclub incident in which he did a sexual dance with an underage girl that he was unknown of. It turned out to be a huge disaster in many people’s life including that young girl who was embarrassed from her parents and society for her action with the singer. Also his friend, Gwen Stefani’s which he was schedule to be a support act for “the Sweet escape tour” lost a three million sponsorship from Verizon Wireless because of that incident which got viral. Akon said on Associated press, “I want to sincerely apologize for the embarrassment and any pain I’ve caused to the young woman who joined me on stage, her family and the Trinidad community for the events at my concert.” He has beautifully mentioned all those small details in his song and in the end of the song, he mentioned “I am just a singer trying to entertain, because I love my fans, I’ll take that blame, even though the blames on you and I will take that blame from you.” In other words, he agreed to take all the blames from the young girl who was embarrassed from their parents and society by her action with him.

However, my experience from my sister incident was not exactly like the singer but I can relate it with the song. I was at my highschool away from my home when it all happened. My sister completed her high school and she always wanted to continue her education and career in foreign country like US or UK. She applied for the visa in most of foreign countries for her further education but it got denied for some reason. She was frustrated with the idea of not getting to live her career in foreign country but my father offered her to start her own business in Nepal. It was not long after my father opened a small business for her but then they found out that she got pregnant from her boyfriend. We used to live in a small community where everyone knows and familiar with each other and in our country, getting pregnant before marriage is a biggest embarrassment for the family. My family wanted her for the abortion but her boyfriend want to keep and raise the child. She was going through hell from all the pressure from family, her boyfriend, her career and from pregnancy as well. As her brother, I was not there to support her at the time she needed me the most. She tried to call me but our highschool did not allow cell phone. I was unknown of anything that was happening in her life. When I got back, I found out that she was taken to the hospital due to depression.

In the beginning of the song, it says,” I’m sorry for the times I left you home,I was on the road and you were alone, I’m sorry for the times that I had to go, I’m sorry for the fact that I did not know” and in the end,”Even though the blames on you, I’ll take that blame from you.” However, I feels the same way as song described. I feels terrible that I wasn’t there for her when she needed me the most and I am always  sorry about it and If I can, I will take all the blame, suffer, embarrassment from her.